I Quit Coffee and Other Hilarious Things I never thought I'd Say

Coffee....ahhh, coffee!
And by coffee I mean, delicious flavored coffee with cream.
How I have loved you, let me count the years!

OK, so seriously, I have been drinking coffee since I was a kid.
 Being a Roper = Loving Coffee
I remember sitting around family dinners with the grown ups having decaf coffee and milk when I was 8 years old. But I didn't full out adopt the habit for myself until my college years. As an adult, waking up to a mug or two of coffee , my bible and journal has been a constant daily routine. Sometimes, I gotta be honest,  coffee with God was my only reason for pulling my exhausted body out of bed. You see, when you are surrounded by your darling children all day long, those few moments of centering and quiet with the Lord and a steaming cup of coffee in the morning are priceless.

The soothing delight of a cup of coffee is woven into so many aspects of my life...perhaps its lingering over coffee  with my hubby in our red chairs on a low key Saturday morning.
 Maybe its taking in a gorgeous Colorado sunset with my parents on their deck.
Or grabbing a Starbucks with a friend.
And sometimes it's the little perk of sipping on your coffee during a long drive or meeting.
 Yes, I have a lot of emotion wrapped up in my coffee drinking habit.

So why on earth would I give it up?
This fall I was diagnosed with adrenal fatigue and celiac.
This gave me a revelation about why my mugs of coffee were key parts of my day, even in summer. Coffee was flat getting my cortisol depleted body through the day! 

However, it was also causing increased stress on my adrenal glands and was part of a cycle where I was hyped up and then crashed. To support my adrenal glands and heal them I needed to cut the caffeine. 

So I switched to decaf! BOOM problem solved! not really...

There were other issues.

 my coffee had been tampered with.
You see, when I was diagnosed with celiac and all my food sensitivities, I found out that milk was a problem for my gut. So out went the half and half (btw I had spent a year weening my taste buds off of processed GMO creamers to half and half).

 Let me tell you, my coffee was not the same with almond milk or coconut milk. 

Yes, I tried bullet proof coffee with coconut oil and ghee in it. Not the same! 

Fall is a horrible time of year to have limitations placed on your coffee...I mean its PUMPKIN SPICE LATTE time!

So fast forward to Thanksgiving, my family was in town. 

My energy was tanked and my mood was bleck...I decided to have a cup of REAL CAFFEINATED COFFEE..and within 5 min I was in a happy mood and my body was ready to roll! 

When you have felt fatigued, depressed, and foggy for months on end, experiencing that high really is delightful! I jumped back into my caffeinated coffee addiction with two feet! And bonus, I found a delightful pure cane sugary vanilla  almond milk creamer to go with it. At times my cup was 1/3 creamer and 2/3rds coffee.... just writing about it makes me giddy with cravings. 

Did I mention I was supposed to be off sugar? yeah...Dr's orders. 

Funny thing about caffeine and sugar...you know they aren't healthy, you know that they are bad for you in the long run, but damn aren't they good when you use them! Don't they just perk you right up and give you the energy to do your day! HELLO ADDICTION!

So I decided I would indulge this unhealthy delightful habit through the holidays, then in January I would cut the chords. 

So, damn, its January. And its day 4 of no coffee.

 I thought I would crave it more. 

I don't really crave it for the taste at the moment, what I crave is the instant energy and brain fog lift. 

I nearly caved this morning when it was 9am and I felt like crawling back into bed. 

But I didn't. 

I drank a protein shake and went walking with a friend. 

I mean if you blab this stuff on a blog, someone will call you out if you are a loser who quits after 4 days, right!?

This is hard stuff...but I know it will help me heal and bring balance to my body.

 I look forward eagerly to the day when I can be one of those chicks that says, " oh I used to drink coffee but I feel so fabulous off of it! " 

Until that day, or at least until my detox days pass, you probably don't want to mess with me! 

Will I bring coffee back at some point in the future? Who knows. Right now, I commit to nothing but  3 months...January, February, March...no coffee...then we will see!! 

Here's to You Diet Coke and Chocolate!

"All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. third, it is accepted as being self-evident." - Arthur Schopenhauer

This quote absolutely describes my journey into clean eating....and its been a long reluctant one.

What was wrong with living on diet coke, microwave popcorn, and hot tamales? They were getting me through the day!( This photo is of my lunch one day, lunch of champions!)

 I used to laugh my head off at anyone who talked about limiting carbs. I often have joked that I could go on an all carb diet but not a low carb diet! And don't you even mess with my sugar! This girl has dessert after lunch and dinner and her breakfast has long been healthy eggo waffles and coconut coffee creamer!

The truth is I liked eating what I wanted, when I wanted it.
 I thought it was food freedom.
 I especially liked it when I could manipulate things so that I was at my goal weight and still getting my delicious junk foods.

In my ignorant bliss I laughed and ignored all the "fads" around whole foods and paleo diets. I had no clue that a diet built on little nutrition and high in processed sugar would one day hand me a nasty little bill.

When my family and I moved to Texas in 2013, I was feeling physically and emotionally a mess. It had been a hard spring preparing for a move I did not want to make.

 I had drowned my sorrows in tons of twizzlers, reese's peanut butter cups, cokes, and fast food meals. And don't even get me started on the coffee in the morning and wine in the evening.
It was a bad set up and I was starting to see the results.

•   weight gain
• brain was so foggy
• tired and depressed
•   left side pain
•  alternating constipated and diarrhea
• abdominal pain most of the month 

By the time we moved into our new home, I was having a new more intense type of brain fog that I could best describe as dizziness or bobble head. It was such a vague symptom with such a big impact on my daily life! I drank tons of caffeine to try to get enough clarity to do my day, which involved homeschooling our 3 kids.

 This situation caused me to slowly opened my mind a tiny bit to consider a different way of eating.


Last New Year's Day, fresh off a delightful hysterectomy, I entertained the idea of going sugar free, I knew it would be good for me. I even bought this amazing book: "I quit Sugar: Your complete 8 week detox program and cookbook" by Sarah Wilson. But when I read it, I laughed and thought, that chick is crrrraazy!  So I've suffered along another year.

In September, after reading , It Starts With Food: Discover the Whole30 and Change Your Life in Unexpected Ways I did my first Whole 30, because I believed God asked me to.
( more on that in another post)

In the first week of October, I was told that it appears I might have celiac (click here to find out more about celiac) disease. And according to a food allergy test, I had a leaky gut and a whole host of other food sensitivities at this moment. The foods I was "allowed" to eat were shrinking fast.

Still, I had to keep taking the long way ...

•  multiple grillings of my doctors
• various blood tests
• research research research  
• some cheating and
• a very expensive nutritionist, 

 Now I'm fully convinced I need to do a no sugar, low fruit diet.
I am back to a slightly adapted Whole 30 style eating plan.

Sometimes I get really frustrated with myself.
Why didn't I just take the doctor's word for it and eat meat, veggies, and fruit with no sugar from October on?

 I'd probably feel a lot better right now.

Still, I guess its a process and one I have to be fully invested in and convinced of. If I have to make a few mistakes and learn by trial and error, so be it. I think God knows that about me. I'm so grateful for His grace and patience.

For someone as opposite to this lifestyle as I was, its bound to take baby steps.

So, if you are reading this and you have just found out that you need to take drastic lifestyle changes for your health, then know you aren't alone.
Just keep moving forward one step at a time.
 We will process through this together.
We can do this!
For my Aunt Suzie, I'm documenting my journey for you. If you have to follow me down this road, then I hope what I learn will help make your journey easier.

Here's to the dawning of a new season!
xoxo Michelle

Stay tuned:

When the clock strikes midnight on December 31st, I am embarking on the latest adventure in my journey...quitting coffee....look for my post, "I quit coffee and other hilarious things I never thought I'd say."